God, aka. The Great Sadist in the Sky
Keeping my heart open while it was being pummeled by the death of my parents, followed by the death of my marriage and combined with the death of freedom during the pandemic was nearly impossible and had me deem God “The Sadist in the Sky.” This was before I knew much about kink but these events became a catalyst for my desire to experience more and digest it through writing.
It has been a journey these past two years of finding my safe word, finding my power and my place. Through lots of surrender/prayer and compassion for myself with what I cannot control combined with acting on what I can; through the friendships I’ve made through the breathwork, orgasmic meditation and kink communities that I have the honor of belonging to; and through developing self-love that comes with treating myself as my own favorite lover, I have been able to come down from red, into yellow and finally into green. While the journey has not been easy, the scene continues!